Beauty from Ashes: A Christian Romance (BlackThorpe Security Book 5) Read online

  Her gaze landed briefly on Connor and Jordan before she turned to leave them. Connor had been surprised when she’d sat next to him during the service. He wasn’t quite sure what to make of her actions most of the time. Had she really been able to get past what had happened between them, to the point where she really didn’t mind being around him?

  He would be very glad if that were the case, but there was every possibility that she was just tolerating his presence and putting on a very good act. Not that he felt like she was offering him friendship or anything, but she wasn’t treating him like an enemy either. Connor watched her walk away, her movements graceful as she wove among the groups of people standing in the foyer.

  “You don’t have a girlfriend, do you?”

  Connor turned his attention to Jordan, who was staring at him with a curious expression on his face. “No. My job’s made it kinda difficult to spend much time dating.”

  “But you don’t have that job anymore,” Jordan pointed out. “So now you do have time to date, right?”

  “Yes, I suppose I do, but until I feel a bit more settled, it’s still not something I’m going to pursue.”

  “What aren’t you going to pursue?” Alex asked as he rejoined the group, obviously only hearing the last part of Connor’s response to Jordan.

  “He says he’s not going to pursue dating right now.” Jordan seemed all too happy to fill his father in on the details. “I’m just thinking maybe he doesn’t have to look too far to find someone to date.”

  Connor immediately picked up on what Jordan was insinuating, but he decided to just let it go. Protesting would make them wonder why he wasn’t interested in Adrianne, and that really was something he’d rather not get into with them. He did find himself wondering—as yet someone else tried to set him up with Adrianne—if there was something people saw that made them think they would be good together. Or was it just the fact that they were both still single?

  “Well, there are certainly some nice women here at the church,” Alex said as he glanced around. “If you decide you’d like to date, let me know, and I can introduce you to a few of them.”

  “Are they the ones who were giving me dirty looks when you presented me as your wife?” Rebecca asked with an arched brow.

  Alex slid his arm around Rebecca’s waist and pulled her to his side. “I had no interest in them even before you were on the scene.” He pressed a kiss to her temple. “There’s only ever been room for one woman in my heart, and that’s you.”

  Connor wondered what it must be like to be so certain of one’s feelings. By all accounts, Alex and Rebecca’s love for each other shouldn’t have survived the misunderstandings, the hurt, and the years apart. Yet here they were, their relationship still strong even though they’d both changed and matured since they’d pledged their love to each other so many years ago.

  How might things have ended up for him and Adrianne if he’d responded differently? What might have happened if he had said yes to her when she’d asked him to go with him to that dance? For sure it wouldn’t have gone as badly as the date he had ended up with that night. What if he had listened to his heart instead of the ugly voices of his teammates? What if he’d been strong enough to stand up for what he wanted instead of caving to peer pressure? Would that have been the start of a lifelong relationship between the two of them? Or would they have decided to just be friends?

  So many questions he’d never know the answers to.

  Even though he knew he should never dwell on the what-ifs, it was definitely hard not to. Regret fueled those wonderings. Maybe his chance at real love had come and gone already, and now he had to live with that knowledge, knowing that there was nothing he could do to change it. Or rather, knowing that he did not deserve a chance to change it.

  “I was actually thinking more about Aunt Adrianne,” Jordan said, his gaze going back and forth between his dad and Connor. “She’s single too.”

  “That would be a bit weird, don’t you think?” Connor said as they began to walk towards the door.

  “Do you mean because her brother is married to your sister?” Jordan asked.

  “Yeah. We’re kind of in-laws.”

  Alex gave him a thump on the shoulder. “There’s no kind of about it, dude. You are in-laws.”

  “You may be in-laws, but you’re not really related.” Jordan seemed to feel the need to clarify that particular point.

  “No, we’re not, but I don’t think either of us wants to date someone just because the other is convenient. There’s got to be a little bit more to it than that.”

  Connor glanced at Jordan in time to see a frown cross his face. “But I’m not the only one that thinks it’s a good idea. Grandma and Mom do too.”

  “Here’s the thing, buddy. Adrianne is a beautiful woman, and she seems very nice, but that doesn’t automatically mean that we are supposed to be together. What happens if we do decide to date and then things don’t work out? Don’t you think that might be a bit awkward since we’d still have to be around each other? I think your aunt would agree that it’s better to just not go that route. Family is too important to us to risk that just because we both happen to be single.”

  Jordan’s shoulders slumped a bit. “I suppose you’re right. I just thought it would be cool if you two dated and maybe ended up getting married like Dad and Mom.”

  Connor slipped his arm around Jordan’s shoulders, still a bit surprised by how much his nephew had grown since he’d last seen him. “While I appreciate you looking out for me, I think this is something that I’m just going to have to do on my own. I pray there’s someone out there for me the way there was for your mom, but if not, I’ll still be okay.”

  Once they left the building, Connor got directions to the restaurant then invited Jordan to ride with him. He hoped that the boy would drop the subject of him and Adrianne before they got to the restaurant.

  “Mom said that maybe I could go to a Christian school next year instead of her homeschooling me.”

  Connor glanced over at Jordan as he guided the car out of the parking lot, not sure how they’d ended up on that particular topic. “Is that something that you’d like?”

  “Yes. I think it would be an easier way to make friends. You know, guy friends, but also girl…friends.

  “Ah. Yes, I could see how that would be a good thing for you. I’m sure you must be missing your friends from Chicago.”

  “Yeah, but Dad promised that I could go there to visit sometimes, or he’d fly my best friend here to visit me.”

  Connor was happy to hear that his nephew seemed to be adjusting well to the move to the Twin Cities. Considering he’d left his friends and home behind, Connor wouldn’t have been surprised if the boy had been a little bit more upset about things. But apparently gaining a father was a good trade-off in Jordan’s mind.

  Once they joined Alex and Rebecca at the restaurant, the conversation turned from girlfriends to video games to bestseller lists and more. After he’d eaten his fill, Connor relaxed in his chair, grateful to be enjoying time with his sister and his nephew. Now he just needed to figure out the rest of his life and he’d be good to go. With or without a girlfriend.

  Over the next week, Connor saw very little of Adrianne. He wasn’t sure if that’s just how it had worked out or if it was by her design. He truly hoped that she wasn’t going out of her way to avoid him. That wasn’t something that would make life easy for either of them in the long run.

  He knew that one way to correct the situation would’ve been for him to look for a new apartment. It was hard to latch onto the idea, however, since one of the things he’d been looking forward to when he retired was being close to Rebecca and Jordan. In fact, he’d assumed that they would all live together, at least for the first little while. Of course, that was before he’d found out about her and Alex.

  Though the apartment over the garage wasn’t large, it was more than adequate for what he needed plus it gave him privacy while still allowing h
im to be close to Rebecca and Jordan. He liked that he could wander over anytime he wanted to see either of them. And he really enjoyed the family meals they had, especially when everyone was there. These were the things that he had missed because of his work. He was just selfish enough to not want to have to give that up.

  And, of course, he did cherish the opportunity to see Adrianne and to learn about the woman she’d become. He’d never tell her that, or anyone else for that matter, but she’d been a part of his life for so long—even if it had just been in his mind—that the chance to be around her in real life was hard to consider giving up.

  “I happened to run into Patsy McNamara today.” Connor heard Alex say as he let himself into the house. “She mentioned that she’d been doing some work for you. When were you planning to tell me that you are looking into buying a house?”

  Connor slowed his steps, not wanting to interrupt but also because he wanted to hear the answer to Alex’s question.

  “I’m just looking for now,” Adrianne replied. “I can’t live here forever, so I figured maybe I should start looking to see if I can find my dream house while I can do it without pressure.”

  “So if you found the house of your dreams tomorrow, you’d be moving out?”

  “I suppose so. But I’ve looked at a bunch of houses already and haven’t found a suitable one, so I don’t think it’s going to be happening too soon.”

  “That’s beside the point, Annie. Why didn’t you tell me you were looking for a house? You always said that you planned to find your dream man and then your dream house. Why have you suddenly decided to go for the house when you don’t have the man?”

  Connor winced, wondering if his presence was what was driving Adrianne to look for a home of her own without finding a man—her dream man—first.

  “To be honest, I realized that I’m not getting any younger and putting off a lot of my dreams while I wait for someone who may or may not come into my life isn’t very smart. I always assumed that I’d get married and have a family, but maybe that’s not what God has in store for me. That doesn’t mean that I can’t go after the other things that I’ve dreamed about having in my life, though. So my first step is looking for a house. Then maybe next year, I’ll go and visit some of those countries I’ve been wanting to see.”

  “While I’m happy that you’re pursuing your dreams, I just hope that that’s your true motive and that you’re not feeling like you’re being pushed out of the house because Rebecca and Jordan have moved in. If anything, maybe the three of us should be looking to buy a place of our own.”

  Connor didn’t think Alex sounded all that happy that Adrianne was pursuing her dreams the way he said he was. He wouldn’t have been surprised if Alex felt the way Connor had when he’d learned that not only had Rebecca known who Jordan’s father was all along, she’d been married to the man. It smacked a bit of a betrayal—a sister they were close to not telling them about important things.

  “I’m not going to tell you not to look for a place of your own with Rebecca and Jordan,” Adrianne said. “But don’t think that you doing that will stop me from looking for a home of my own. We all knew when we moved in here that it wasn’t going to be something permanent. It’s lasted longer than we thought it would, but now I really do need to feel that I’m in a place where I’m going to stay for more than another year or two.”

  Connor felt like maybe he needed to either head into the kitchen so that they knew he was there or leave. The decision was taken out of his hands when Jordan called out his name, and he turned to see his nephew coming toward him from the basement stairs.

  Jordan bumped his shoulder against Connor’s once he got to his side. “You here for supper?”

  “Yeah. Your mom told me she was making plenty.” Connor still wasn’t sure about approaching the kitchen, but whatever conversation had been going on seemed to have ended. “So what have you been up to today?”

  As he listened to Jordan talk about his day, Connor followed him into the kitchen, trying not to look as if he’d just overheard a conversation that wasn’t meant for him. He was a bit surprised to see that Rebecca was in there. For some reason, he’d thought the conversation had just been between Alex and Adrianne.

  He walked to where Rebecca stood and pressed a kiss to his sister’s cheek then peered over her shoulder at the pot on the stove in front of her. “Chili. Yum.”

  Rebecca looked over and gave him a quick smile, but it didn’t hide the tension on her face. “I even made your favorite cornbread.”

  “I knew I was your favorite brother.” Connor tried to tease a smile—a more genuine one—from her, but still, she didn’t give him anything more than she’d given him a minute earlier. He heard voices and soon they were joined by Melanie, Tyler, and Ryan. He noticed that it didn’t take long for Melanie to pick up on the tension in the room. Her gaze went back and forth between her two older siblings who had both taken up places in the kitchen, arms crossed. For the first time, Connor could truly see the similarities between the fraternal twins.

  “What’s going on, you two?” Apparently, Melanie had no qualms about facing the elephant in the room.

  Alex turned to stare at Melanie. “I just found out today that Adrianne has been looking for a house and plans to move out.” His gaze narrowed briefly. “How long have you known about her plans?”

  Connor was a bit in awe of the way the three siblings seemed to be able to read each other. Alex seemed to know that Melanie was already aware of Adrianne’s plans.

  Now it was Melanie’s turn to fold her arms and glare at him. “A little while. Sisters talk. Plus, you had your secrets. She’s entitled to a few of her own.”

  Movement out of the corner of his eye drew Connor’s attention, and he watched as Tyler and Ryan both took a step back. Did they know something that he didn’t? Was it best to go for cover when the three of them got like this?

  “A few of her own?” Alex swung back to face Adrianne. “What else aren’t you telling me?”

  Connor was suitably impressed when neither sister shot a look in his direction because he was fairly certain that one of those secrets was his history with Adrianne. This whole interplay between the siblings was interesting for Connor. For many reasons, not the least of which was him wanting to see how Alex handled something like this. After all, his sister and nephew were in close contact with the man, and Connor needed to feel confident that they would always be safe with him.

  “If I told you that, it wouldn’t be a secret now would it?” Adrianne retorted. “I don’t expect you to tell me everything about your life, Alex, and I would expect you to give me the same courtesy. We may be twins, but there are just some things that a girl isn’t going to talk to her brother about.”

  Alex’s arms uncrossed, but that was only so that he could stand with his hands on his hips. “I could understand it if we were talking about girl things like a guy you thought was cute or something like that, but buying a house of your own? Why wouldn’t you talk to me about that? After all, I do have some experience in real estate.”

  “Honestly? You want to know the reason why I didn’t talk to you about it?” Alex nodded but wisely kept his mouth shut. Even Connor could hear the edge to Adrianne’s voice as she spat out the question. “Because I figured I’d get a reaction just like this. There was no sense in rocking the boat until I had a reason to. You’ve got a lot going on right now, as you have had for a while. I’m making decisions about my life. I think I’m old enough to do that now.”

  Adrianne didn’t bother waiting for Alex’s response. She walked stiffly across the kitchen, her shoulder brushing against Connor’s as she moved past him on her way out. Silence fell in her wake, and Connor glanced around to note the reactions of those left behind. Tyler and Ryan were both staring at the floor while Rebecca had remained with her back to the room, her attention presumably on the chili in the pot. Jordan stood next to Melanie, his mouth open and his eyes wide as he looked from his dad to Melanie.
Almost as if he was waiting for the other shoe to drop.

  “For Pete’s sake.” Alex let out a long sigh as his head bent forward.

  “How did you expect her to react, Alex?” Melanie asked. “You’re making her feel like she’s not smart enough to make decisions about her own life. If she wants to buy a house, she’s allowed to do that. If she wants to fly off to Australia for a year, she’s allowed to do that too.”

  Connor felt his eyes widen at that remark, and clearly, it hadn’t just registered with him. Alex’s head shot up. “She wants to go to Australia for a year?”

  “Oh, for Pete’s sake.” Hearing Melanie say it in almost the exact tone of exasperation that her brother had used nearly made Connor laugh out loud. However, the idea of Adrianne going to Australia for a year did not. “I’m not saying that’s something she wants to do. I’m just saying that if it was, she could do it, and there would be nothing you could say about it. Well, aside from her job.”

  Connor let out a sigh of relief. He wasn’t sure why it didn’t sit well to think of her going to the other side of the globe. It was bad enough to think that he might be her motivation for moving out of this house, but he really didn’t think he could stand the idea that she might be going to the other side of the world to avoid him.

  “Alex, why don’t you go talk to Adrianne,” Rebecca suggested, her voice calm and soft. “Perhaps this is a discussion the two of you need to have without an audience. Dinner will be waiting when you’re done.”

  Having been on the receiving end of that tone of voice from Rebecca, Connor wasn’t all too surprised when Alex let out another long sigh and left the kitchen. It did encourage him to know that Alex wasn’t irrational when it came to situations like this. He could’ve lashed out at Rebecca or even balked at her suggestion, but instead, he’d gone to do as she’d asked.

  Once Alex was out of earshot, Rebecca spun to face the rest of them, a wide—yet still not genuine—smile on her face. “Let’s eat.”